The more that is learned about domestic violence, the more there is to learn. Couples' lives slide into a cycle of arguing and physical abuse for any number of reasons. Financial problems, infidelity, a loss of trust, and the need for control are among some of the main reasons that instigate an oral argument that can turn physical. But exactly what is domestic abuse?
If you are in a rocky relationship where arguments have made the dangerous turn toward physical contact and you have wondered if you have crossed the line into abuse, here are some warning signals you could be an abuser.
Six Signs You are An Abuser
1. You are impulsive and unpredictable. When you are angry, nothing your partner can say can console you and you find yourself lashing out, shoving, or pushing your partner in frustration.
This kind of behavior is known as “battering”. When you do not get the answers you are looking for in a discussion or you feel your partner is not fully supporting your opinion, you grow enraged.
2. Your partner never gets physical with you but he or she grows equally as angry during an argument. His or her remarks just “set you off.”
You think you would not have resorted to any physical activity if your partner would simply have agreed with you or shown you empathy.
3. You are boiling beneath the surface all the time. You attempt to maintain your frustration but can feel a seething irritation that grows and becomes more volatile as time goes on.
You struggle to gain control of the circumstances and your partner is not relenting. Sometimes you can maintain your urge to become violent. Other times, you cannot.
4. Life in your home has its ups and downs. You can contain everything until you have something to drink.
Routinely, when you drink, you find yourself having to apologize for arguments and injuries that you may not even remember.
5. You are never to blame for any argument. If only your partner would follow your “rules” everything would be fine.
If you have blamed your partner for striking out or shoving, or if you have denied physical contact despite knowing you struck your partner, you are likely already inside the cycle.
6. You forced your sexual advances onto your partner when he or she was clearly not interested.
Any sexual advances, intercourse, or even forced kisses or sexual touching, when your partner has clearly been uninterested are signs of serious sexual abuse.
If one or more of these apply to you, you could be accused by your partner of domestic violence and you should consider seeking some help. If you already have been charged with a domestic abuse offense, the penalties are difficult and could include expensive fines, jail time, no contact orders, or more. As a former prosecutor, Steve Karimi is skilled in helping you arrange a strong defense. Be sure to make informed choices in your domestic violence case. Call Karimi Law Office today.